Death,loneliness and the relationship trap

Death

My beloved uncle recently died, he was the last person in my parental team to do so. Do I miss him -everyday I do for I wakeup planning to call him and tell him something. Then I remember technology cannot assist me here. Then the grieving begins.

I remember him being a great listener and showed loving concern for his family. But death came calling and fragile humans can only answer. So on the dreadful morning in September 2007 was his turn to answer the call.

Left behind is his loving niece, relatives, co-worker and friends. We mourn all him. I feel his loss.

Loneliness

A few years, even a few months ago I would say what is that? But since September 07 it’s been my bedfellow. I feel the loss of love, care and attention that radiated from the soul of my parental team to me.

Relationship trap

A few well meaning acquaintances are trying to coerce me into looking for a husband, boyfriend and man. Depends on which one of them is doing the persuading. These folks rationale is that now I'm alone I need a man to take care of me.Would the many women who thought this way and did go out and get a man hoping to be "taken care" off please standup. It’s a ridiculous delusional thinking that both genders have that statistics and experiences of relationship don’t support-Ask any psychologist. Ask the many divorced couples.

Being "taken care" of by a man or by anyone was never my life goal. Furthermore my psyche rebels against such advice. My soul deplores resorting to such a pathetic option. Are these people advising me see no other way of existing? You know I cannot even recall asking them for advice.

What about what I want? I sure know what I don't want. I don't want to be another woman who wades her way through an unhappy relationship just to operate under a facade of care. Hey I experienced the care and the real deep healthy loving from my team. As a result I could recognize the fake a mile away.

My greatest fear is becoming a stereotype; actually my sense of survival, self appreciation and self awareness -that deep instinct that we often ignore - says "no way" whenever I hear the platitudes.

In my humorous mind frame I think as I listen -ha where to I go find the paragon of manhood that that I being advised to look for? In jail? The rubbish heap? In another woman's home?

I conclude that some advice is ment for the wayside and this one just found its home.

I solute you my parental team, I remember you, I miss you and I love you for you love support and guidance while I was in your care has assisted in identifying the connections and the differences between loneliness and the relationship trap. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.